Use a plunger.
I have always depended on the kindness of strangers (who write how-tos on the Internet)
Last Fall, on certain days of the week my schedule gave me two hours of free time between my classes. One day, while I was wasting that hour, flipping through daytime television, as I usually did, I ended up flipping all the way up to the Cartoon Network. To my surprise, it was a Powerpuff Girls marathon.
Sugar and spice and everything nice!
The city of TOWNSVILLE!
Blossom, Buttercup, Bubbles and the Professor!
Tearing myself away from the TV that day was one of the most difficult things I had ever had to do, but then I took my first Anthropology test and those quickly became the most difficult things I ever had to do.
Last Saturday at work, while perusing the Internet, one of my co-workers and I found this website that was railing on the most ridiculous pair of heels. The second I saw this shoe it reminded me of one of the villains from the Powerpuff Girls series, so I googled it.
On the spectrum of ridiculous google searches thus far, this is hardly that ridiculous. But
My surrogate little sister, Hannah, does not exist in the real world and did not know that the cat hanging from a tree, with the words “Hang in there!” written above it was a pretty popular motivational poster. She swore up and down that I made it up, so I had to prove her wrong, thus: ridiculous google searches, pt. deux.
I made dessert last night–fried ice cream; a recipe that called for the use of a coconut. I stupidly wandered around WalMart and then Dillon’s searching for coconut flakes, because they sell those, right? No, no they don’t. I figured that out hours later when I finally just bought the damn coconut.
I imagined I’d get it open with sheer brain power, so I took a nap and figured when I woke up it all would have worked itself out. Before deciding to just not make the dessert, I said to myself, I says: “Bea, why don’t you just Google how to open a coconut?” So I did and, man, there are a lot of people on the Interwebz that are dying to show us how to open coconuts:
I mean, really? One is totally enough.
As you can see, I clicked the first one and went to work.
Finally, I got to get some use out of those tools I told my mom I’d need for the year.
And do you know what the loudest most obnoxious sound in the world is? The sound a hammer makes when trying to crack open a coconut wrapped up in a towel.
And the most tedious process in the world (not including any office job ever worked by anyone, anywhere in the entire world)? Scraping coconut fruit out of the coconut rind.
And, holy shit, rounding up ingredients? NEVER again. Never, ever, ever again.
And do you want to know the most satisfying crunch of all (not including the crunch of Cap’n Crunch)? The first bite of your first ever, not made from a box dessert.